Feeds:
Posts
Comments
devynneleven (12:31:58 PM): i’ll have to find out when i’m ovulating and go that day
ohpapaya (12:33:03 PM): there’s an app for that
devynneleven (12:33:46 PM): lol!
anywho. fail blogger right here.  gettin back in the game, jumpin back on the wagon.
I’m goin to North Carolina next weekend to visit my mumma.  I haven’t seen her since November 1st! miss her lotttssss, and I miss nellers.  I can’t wait to squeeze that cat.  She’s the bitchiest cat you’ll EVER meet.  Seriously, the biggest psycho EVER! But that’s why we love her 🙂
ummm what else?  I am having a brain fart.  I think ima try to find a second job again….  I gotta start saving for when I have to move out.  I know i’m gonna have to pay a HELL of a security deposit wherever i go.  Save devynn, save!!!
Ok, that’s all I got.  It was something though, right?

I’ve been doing a lot of self reflecting lately.  I’ve been very “in my head” for a few days…i kinda like when i get like this because it makes me feel deep and interesting. But it’s also annoying because my brain needs a break.

what it comes down to is, i suck at communication, and i’m too guarded.

but then a friend said something to make me feel a little better about myself, heres how it went down:

her (9:09:05 PM): remember when i first started to hang out, i thought you hated me bc you never talked to me lol
me (9:09:22 PM): lol yeh it takes me a long time to let people in
me (9:09:27 PM): is that a good thing or bad? i dunno!
her (9:09:42 PM): its both!! it makes you you

and then she went on to give me some analogy about diamonds and coal.  it was actually quite helpful and made me feel less frustrated with myself.
her (9:10:07 PM): think of it like this
her (9:10:32 PM): you go stright to the diamonds before the coal
her (9:10:48 PM): i go through the coal to get the diamonds
her (9:11:00 PM): wtf am i talking about?
me (9:11:05 PM): lolol
me (9:11:20 PM): coal and diamonds? i dont get it
her (9:11:27 PM): lol diamonds come from coal
me (9:12:17 PM): oh so you mean like, i weed out all the coal and find the diamonds?
her (9:12:24 PM): yes!!!
me (9:12:30 PM): i like it!
me (9:12:36 PM): good analogy
her (9:12:37 PM): you dont even bother with the coal, you keep your hands clean!

so, in conclusion, i guess i’m being a little too hard on myself.
but it wouldn’t hurt to break down some of my walls, right?

i’ll try.

in other news, i finally did something to my ‘who?’ page: https://yooshername.wordpress.com/about/

rawr

I used to think I didn’t fit the leo mold.  But, lately, I am beginning to find lots of traits that sound just like me.  I recently bought a really cool book, here’s a little bit about what it says about me.  I bolded the things I agree with…. what do you think??

LEO

“Symbolized by the blazing and radiant sun, the fixed fire sign of Leo spreads its creative warmth over all within its sphere of influence.  Leos pride themselves on keeping their fire under control and making judgment calls that can benefit others. Passionate emotionally, those born under this sign will not be denied what they desire and are prepared to fight for it if necessary.  Leos demand the respect of others and will prove reliable by following through on their commitments.”

The Leo First Date:

Should you ignite Leo’s fire on the first date, the only problem you may face afterward is trying to put it out.  Traditionally standoffish, on a first date Leos will usually adopt a pragmatic attitude:  Let’s see what you are made of.  Therefore, a Leo first date is turned into a kind of tryout in which you are measured and judged.  If acceptable, further developments are possible; if you fail the test, you are out. Remember, it is generally the Leo who does the rejecting, not you.  Should you break this rule, beware of the consequences sure to be showered on you by the spurned leo first date.

Affection and the Leo Boyfriend/Girlfriend

Leos are generally passionate rather than senuous types, preferring outright sexual expressions to affectionate ones.  They like to maintain a cool persona in public, so they will avoid hugs, snuggles, fond looks, and other overtly affectionate gestures.  This may also carry over into times when you are alone with them.  To Leos, being overly affectionate is not only unnecessary, but it can actually irritate them and turn them off entirely. You will have to educate them about your own special needs in this department if they are not forthcoming.  Be prepared to encounter some resistance.

The Leo Friend

Leos are legendary for making excellent friends.  Their loyalty, devotion, and support can be outstanding, and they are known for standing by their closest friends in both good times and bad.  Their need to be needed is not overly great, so they will also quite happily leave you alone for long periods of time if you prefer it that way, without the friendship sufferingOn the other hand, they enjoy a daily check-in or interaction with their best friends and love to share the latest news and gossip. They prefer actual meetings to virtual ones, but since your schedules may be busy, the odd text message or phone call will suffice until you can see eachother again.

the goods

So, it’s taken me a while to actually do it, but here’s all the GOOD things that are happening, of which i’m happy about.

  • my job. i’m making good money for 3 days per week. and i LOVE tasha.
  • the living situation.  I love living alone. I love doing what i want, when i want, how i want, where i want, however i want to do it.
  • art. drawing/painting/creating comforts me.  It’s good for when I feel like i’m going crazy.  I call it my art therapy.
  • my health.  This last year has been a good year for my health.  I’ve completely (for the most part) have changed my diet for the better, and I’m getting in shape/exercising regularly.  I’ve lost 20 lbs.  I can’t even remember the last time I had any back pain.
  • semi-regular sex isn’t a bad thing either, eh?

that’s all i’ve got.  check back in when i’m in a less cynical phase in my life.

hmmm…

I’m beginning to think that maybe i’m not being as obvious as I think I am.  I think I have my walls built up so high my exterior is probably acting the opposite of how my interior feels. YA KNOW WHAT I MEAN??

on another note, I want this and this:

When I started this post I intended to write more, but i’m really having a brainfart.  And while I’m thinking about it I should dig out that carrot I accidentally dropped into the burner of my stove.

great weekend, great friends, good laughs, happy times. love my life.

today was a very unhealthy eating day. it’s sunday though, so it’s ok…right? chicken wings, chicken nuggets and a mcflurry made up the diet of the day.  one of these things (or perhaps the combination of all 3) is brawling with my stomach now, though.  i feel as tho i might yak!

got my plane ticket to north carolina.  I’ll be there for a long weekend at the end of february…i guess it’ll be warm there by then! woop! excited. i miss my mumma, and nellers.

i love him.

i have a canker sore on the tip of my tongue

i’m having womanly problems

my eyebrows are ridiculous and i can’t get them waxed because of my acne medicine

also, my stache is getting a little out of control. again, with the wax dilema.

the bottom of my feet are so dry they snag on my sheets

i’m finding it quite difficult to save money (maybe i should consider a roommate?)

no matter how much sleep i get, it’s never enough, i’m chronically sleepy

the boy situation is doomed, i think.

tomorrow, i will try to update about the positive things.

anal eaze

blogging is difficult when I’d much rather go to sleep than blog.

tomorrow I’m babysitting Tasha’s cousins.  I kinda dont wanna do it, but I really want the extra $$.  I wanna go snowboarding this weekend and snowboarding ain’t cheap!

I just signed up to have a sex toy party.  I’m hoping I can recruit some people to come to it so it’s not just me, emily, and ashley….that would be awkward….

Today I worked, then went to the gym, then came home and ate dinner, then showered, then did dishes and now i’m watching american idol. Not the most interesting day, and not much interesting stuff to talk about.  I did teach tasha how to kick a ball today. woop! oh, and I almost have her trained to ‘moo’ when i say “what does a cow say?”  baby tricks are the best.

I burned 700 calories at the gym today…

and then i came home and pigged out on chips and ketchup. fml.

what a waste!

also, i tried to dye my hair brown yesterday and it turned red. double fml.

c’mon 2010 gimme something good!